Monthly Archive: January 2019



I left my home town, Tacoma, twice. The last time, 18 years ago, I landed in Woodinville to find myself and a spiritual community. In those 18 years I experienced many community groups, teachers, classes, retreats, books, classes, events, people. A few months ago I felt something coming to an end. Something had stopped. (I blogged about it under the title Pause on December 30.)

It is clear now what this is about. June is the month when a nanny job ends and the house I share is being sold. So, I am returning to my home town! I have sensed this move for months and talked to a daughter about it to test the waters. How would they feel about their “different” mother/grandmother being around more often?

I think about the 18 years here in Woodinville. I like it here and actually feel loved by this city. Isn’t that an odd thing to say? I guess it’s simply a reflection of my feelings about being here—-feelings that go both ways. I will miss all the trees that I’ve come to know. The development, however, is heartbreaking. We have to fight to keep our agriculture valley, we have to fight to keep these trees. So, in my last few months here I continue to do weekly drum meditation in its woods, I continue to love the children I take care of. Returning home is also an act of love. It’s as if more pieces of myself have come together, integrating who I am. And in this new sense of wholeness I get to return home. A complete circle.

The mental mind needs discipline. No, you don’t have to know right now where your new nanny job will be or your new living space. Yes, you can take those steps in a couple of months. In the meantime stay in the moment and learn more about Love—-spiritual Love.

Which reminds me! Since my volcanic eruption with my housemate I am noticing a shift at my core and in my landscape. She is no longer pushing my buttons, getting on my nerves. Why? Because a word keeps popping up from my sub-conscious. That word is “irrelevant.” Odd, how a volcanic eruption can create space for newness. My brain-body is so much like the collective earth-body. We are so Goddess!!

My life-long journey has been about loving myself, others, my community, planet and, with my recent ufology activity, my galaxy and universe. Whew!! That’s quite a ride. Maybe I’ll go home to rest and just be myself with nothing more to accomplish or do spiritually. Now, perhaps my work is simply to Be. That sounds like a fun vacation—-it feels like flying—-a kite flying in wind currents safe, protected, loved.

Cobra Activation

I had a massage yesterday on Martin Luther King Day. The masseuse started at the back of my neck with the axis and atlas vertebrae. Instantly a snake’s face appeared with its coiled body beneath. I remembered a similar image from a Trance session I did last year with Mary Kennedy (shown). I questioned the snake as to what it was doing. It started to dance. So we danced! Yes, a happy dance! Then I saw many coiled snakes spread out across dark space.

My snake represents the Dragon Body which channels Kundalini energy from subtle Heaven to gross Earth and Earth to Heaven. It represents the alchemical process of transmuting lead to gold or the dark ego body to the angelic body…as in the snake shedding its skin.

Snake appeared on the day of the RETURN OF LIGHT ACTIVATION 01-20-2019 / 01-21-2019. “This meditation helps the Light forces to ground the energy of Light on the surface of the planet to resolve the deadlock between the Light and the dark forces, finally setting humanity free.” Snake affirms this activation on Earth !!



volcanic eruption

Enlightenment is a process of knowing one’s Shadow and Light.

I’ve been challenged the past few months by my housemate (a temporary situation). She is a perfectionist and I experience that as controlling. We collide when I am not perfect—-when I forget something or do something abnormal like leaving a door open or forgetting to turn off a light. When she goes into offense I go into defense with red hot anger.

Last night as I was contemplating the situation and asking for higher guidance I heard “Krishnamurti.” I asked, “Don’t you mean Yogananda.” “No, Krishnamurti,” was the reply. So I looked him up on dear Google and saw that this philosopher speaks of self love, love of others and relationships. This morning I woke up to revelations about my anger. Thank you!

Why the reservoir of hot lava in my subconscious? Because I have been different all my life and as a result laughed at and ridiculed. This hurts because I want to fit in and be loved. This has also created deep wounds. So, how do I respond to people when I don’t fit their mold? Yes, I could read a book on “how to” or listen to an expert but as usual I prefer to listen within and with that I receive internal teachers and teachings.

With this new awareness about inner wounds and thus grief (my housemate has her own reservoir of wounds and grief) I will continue to be myself—-both Shadow and Light. In that I let others do the same. Will my hot lava settle down now that I know myself better? Will I have new ways to communicate? Will I love myself more and care less about what others think?

There are many ways to respond to others emotionally. One can suppress feelings and watch them erupt at a later time or express them in the moment and get to know oneself.

I now see how Light balances and smooths out shadows. And this is why enlightenment is a process and not a destination. Enlightenment is loving, forgiving—-an evolving spiral.